In Case You Missed It: The Oscars

Courtesy of NOLA.com

So, the Oscars were Sunday — did you guys hear about this? Didja see this? I put my best, most-critical foot forward and did what anyone from my incredibly self-absorbed generation would do: I tweeted.

Sure, there are about a million recaps of the night’s ceremonies … but how many of those were written by me? Answer: ONE.

Here’s all you needed to know about the 2014 Oscars:

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJennifer Lawrence tripped on the red carpet —
still had a better night than me.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJared Leto won Best Supporting Actor & nailed his speech.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterPharrell wore that big, stupid hat he brought to the GRAMMYs.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterLupita Nyong’o gave an incredible speech & stunned in a blue gown.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterCuba Gooding, Jr. was in a really bizarre-o Pepsi commercial.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterBette Midler performed, then Goldie Hawn presented.
BUT WHERE’S DIANE?

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJohn Travolta completely botched Idina Menzel’s name.
BONUS: See how he’d screw yours up!

Image Courtesy of the TwitterCate Blanchett won Best Actress & is basically BFFs with Julia Roberts.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterTake everything I say seriously, because I am an expert.

No mention of the pizza gag that ran on too long …
No need to talk about the stupid fucking #selfie that broke Twitter …
Just some good, old-fashioned Oscars love.
What was your favorite moment?

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About Wittyburg

Sarcastic, sports-obsessed writer & FL native navigating SF.

4 responses to “In Case You Missed It: The Oscars”

  1. bensbitterblog says :

    I thought the best speech was from those two that wrote the award winning song. They rhymed, and they were excited and they were fun, and they didn’t take forever.

  2. Magz says :

    Matthew McCanaughey’s speech! Didn’t see the movie, but he had a lot to say and an interesting perspective on what we should strive for in life.

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