Tag Archive | bette midler

In Case You Missed It: The Oscars

Courtesy of NOLA.com

So, the Oscars were Sunday — did you guys hear about this? Didja see this? I put my best, most-critical foot forward and did what anyone from my incredibly self-absorbed generation would do: I tweeted.

Sure, there are about a million recaps of the night’s ceremonies … but how many of those were written by me? Answer: ONE.

Here’s all you needed to know about the 2014 Oscars:

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJennifer Lawrence tripped on the red carpet —
still had a better night than me.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJared Leto won Best Supporting Actor & nailed his speech.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterPharrell wore that big, stupid hat he brought to the GRAMMYs.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterLupita Nyong’o gave an incredible speech & stunned in a blue gown.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterCuba Gooding, Jr. was in a really bizarre-o Pepsi commercial.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterBette Midler performed, then Goldie Hawn presented.
BUT WHERE’S DIANE?

Image Courtesy of the TwitterJohn Travolta completely botched Idina Menzel’s name.
BONUS: See how he’d screw yours up!

Image Courtesy of the TwitterCate Blanchett won Best Actress & is basically BFFs with Julia Roberts.

Image Courtesy of the TwitterTake everything I say seriously, because I am an expert.

No mention of the pizza gag that ran on too long …
No need to talk about the stupid fucking #selfie that broke Twitter …
Just some good, old-fashioned Oscars love.
What was your favorite moment?

A Bunch of Hocus Pocus

Halloween is the only holiday — besides my birthday (an actual holiday, not like every tween who thinks her random day of birth is celebrated worldwide) — for which I begin a countdown weeks prior. I love the costumes, candy and creative decor … despite being easily spooked and loathing scary movies.

Enter “Hocus Pocus,” the perfect Halloween movie.

The only real reason you need to watch it is, well, because it’s Hocus freaking Pocus. But in the event that you’re not yet convinced, BuzzFeed has put together 23 reasons why it’s the best Halloween movie of all time.

I’ve said it before, but SJP is in her best role ever here. Between her silly antics, Bette Midler’s teeth and Kathy Najimy’s crazy expressions, it’s cinematic magic.

Fun fact: When my DVR has a meltdown last year, I was most upset about losing this movie from my stored library. I promptly purchased the DVD that following day.

Hello, Sanderson sisters. Goodbye, productivity.