Do you ever have anxiety to the point where you can feel it rising in your throat, just below the surface, and you’re almost scared to speak in case it manifests in a very vomit-y way? No? Me either, I was just asking for a friend.
- Vow to Be Chic: Nothing to be anxious about here. A friend’s friend told me about this ingenious service, and I had to share it with you all. Bridal parties, listen up! Now you can rent (or buy) your dress for an affordable price — so you won’t even have to worry about when you’ll wear a $300 frock again. Can I get an “Amen”?
- “American Crime Story: The Assassination of Gianni Versace”: Will this ACS season top its inaugural foray into The People v. OJ Simpson? Hard to tell. But with another all-star cast and a horrific case, it’ll definitely be thrilling to watch. Full disclosure: I set the DVR as soon as I possibly could! #nerdalert
- Tavaris Jones: You may have seen Tavaris wow the crowd with his dancing on “Ellen” before, but he’s back making headlines with his major moves. How does a tiny human slay the halftime show so smoothly? If I had even 1/10th of his swag, I’d be happy.
- “Finesse” – Bruno Mars f. Cardi B: I was born in the late ’80s, so I consider myself a ’90s kid. And there’s no current song that references the era better than this straight-to-the-top hit. From the “In Living Color” references to the just-announced GRAMMYs performance, this one is sure to be in our heads for a while. Da bomb!
After five packed days back in NYC, it’s safe to say it’s a good thing I no longer live there. My skin, liver, wallet and waistline desperately needed a break from the city that never sleeps. Side note: I, too, apparently never sleep while there. Good thing I’ve got an SNL-laden tribute this week to keep spirits high in my disoriented state.
- Trump’s Halloween “Apprentice” Promo: OK, so this is obviously a throwback to when Darrell Hammond was the king of impersonating Donald Trump, and not Alec Baldwin. It’s kind of eerie to watch it back now, as Trump is now one of our candidates for President, and the impression is dead-on. I recall giggling endlessly at his attempt at an evil laugh, so I hope you’ll enjoy it, too.
- Ashlee Simpson’s Lip-sync Hoedown: In that very same episode, Ashlee Simpson gave us a dance to remember forever. She delivered hit single “Pieces of Me” just fine in the first performance, but in her second shot at the stage, that same song — with vocals — began playing. What would I do in that situation? God only knows. But her awkward jig is burned into our brains, so I hope I would have come up with something a little less memorable.
- Melaniade: Of particular relevance with the impending election was last week’s pre-filmed short, featuring the women in Donald Trump’s life taking him down (and taking him back) à la Beyoncé. If this doesn’t make you laugh, I don’t know what will. It also might make you cringe, but hey, that’s kind of what SNL does best.
- Bruno Mars Is “24K Magic”: I was disappointed to see Emily Blunt hosting last week — not because she married John Krasinski and I loathe her for it — but because I’ve always enjoyed Bruno Mars as a host/musical guest, and he was just singing this time. The thing is, though, he’s never just singing. He’s a performer through and through, and his dynamic dancers put on quite the show.
I write today still recovering from the past weekend’s shenanigans and prepping for what’s coming in the days ahead. So just bear with me:
- Tinder: Well, duh. Even though I’ve already mastered it — and the game aspect isn’t all that exciting anymore — I still have to applaud its creators for appealing to millions of ADD millenials.
- “Chrisley Knows Best”: I was intrigued by the previews for this new show with its patriarch retorting to one child that he’s “been there, done that and got the T-shirt, son, and you’re just doing reruns.” Trust me, it doesn’t disappoint. Catch new episodes Tuesdays at 10 EST on USA.
- Magz Coming to Visit: My one and only, favorite momma is spending a week with me starting tomorrow! I can hardly contain my excitement to show her how grown up I am.
- Christopher Walken Dance Now: I’m told this video went viral yesterday (a year in Internet land), but I discovered it today so LISTEN UP. Umm, it’s a mash-up of Christopher Walken dancing. Not much else to say.
One goal while I was home for Christmas was to help Magz clean out my former bedroom. As we went through countless old memories, I dusted off a favorite book of mine from childhood: “The Silver Slippers.”
My parents enrolled me in dance classes at a very young age, and it soon became my passion. I practiced all of the time, and I read this magical ballerina book from my grandma over and over again.
The necklace that came with it was also rediscovered, so here are some Pinspirations for every little girl who dreamed of being the Prima Ballerina.
1st Position: Ballerina Buns (of Steel?)
2nd Position: Fouetté in Fashion
4th Position: Party Pirouettes
Grand Plié: The Book that Started It All