My favorite month is coming to a close, and I’m nothing short of depressed. The best holiday of the year is tomorrow, but it will only be upstaged come Friday with Christmas countdowns and far-too-early fa-la-las.
So because I’m bitter (like my friend, Ben), I’m totally tapping out and just going to post the only thing on my mind:
Talk about #firstworldproblems. What costume are you wearing this year? Mine had mixed reviews — you can check it out here tomorrow! And Happy Hallo-week!
It’s time for the next installment of this series, wherein I complain about first world problems — AKA things I should be grateful I have access to but annoy me anyway.
Today’s topic: Fantasy Football.
You may recall my announcement last year, just before Team Honey Boo Boo careened off the tracks into a fury of fantasy football failure.
I have an even bigger problem this year, though. I don’t have a league.
It’s been brought to my attention that my former commish is not interested in taking money from people who no longer live in Florida.
Excuse me — rather, he’s only allowing ONE person from out of state to play and the rest of us are left leagueless.
I know what a pain it is to have people Skype in and draft.
I get it. Really, I do.
Prove it, you say?
Because I sat through it last year for ONE person.
My issue is: If they’re letting that same ONE person draft from afar, then what’s the big deal with having a few more do it? Hell, put my team on Autodraft (it’ll probably be better for us all that way).
But don’t take it away for people who pay up (on time, mind you) each season.
Apparently, leaving Floriduh is FROWNED UPON IN THIS ESTABLISHMENT!*
*The .gif I wanted to create from this video refuses to load. Double whammy.
It’s time for the next installment of my latest series, wherein I complain about first world problems — AKA things I should be grateful I have access to but annoy me anyway.
Today’s post is inspired by the ever-bitter Ben, of the aptly named Ben’s Bitter Blog. Check out his rants for guaranteed grumblings and — more importantly — laughs.
Women wear high heels for a variety of reasons: to add height, feel sexier, complete an outfit or make a statement. But what often comes with this killer footwear is a plethora of problems that last long after the other shoe drops.
The long-term effects of wearing high heels are far from fabulous. From corns and callouses to bunions and EXTRA TOES, I have to ask: Why do we put ourselves through this pain?
Yikes. A. Bee.
But I walked behind a woman yesterday who struggled so much for those three blocks, I wanted to hail her a cab to put her out of her misery. The forecast suggested a downpour, yet she actively chose to traipse through New York in stilettos she couldn’t handle.
Down goes Frazier.
I love dressing up as much as the next girl, but I can’t defend the trend of hobbling along for the sake of wearing sky-high shoes. The styles that used to be reserved for special occasions are now everyday office wear, and I don’t get it.
While I agree that a great pair of heels (any shoe, really) can make a statement, I do not think beauty is pain. If you’re struggling to walk, let alone stand — trade ’em out for a wonderful wedge or (gasp!) seductive sandal.
And even if you can rock any heel height without fail, give your poor tootsies a break at least twice a week to minimize damage. Feet are gross enough without the swollen skin and blistered bunions. You’re welcome for that visual.