Tag Archive | the list

30 Before 30

In honor of my upcoming 30th birthday, I’ve researched countless “things to do before 30” lists. And while there are plenty to choose from, I kept coming back to “Thirty Things Every Woman Should Have and Should Know by the Time She’s 30.”

The List was originally published in Glamour by columnist Pamela Redmond Satran in 1997. Over the next 30 weeks, I’ll be tackling each item on The List and reflecting about it here… publicly (gulp). I hope you enjoy and we can grow together. After all, turning older is a privilege denied to many.

By 30, you should have…
3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

I’m sure every woman can relate to the hunt for the perfect LBD, or Little Black Dress. And while I myself own a handful of them — and have worn each for various job interviews and dates — I actually prefer my LRD, or Little Red Dress.

The Dress is a cotton shell, which makes it easy to care for or stash away in a suitcase when traveling. The red hue is vibrant without being overbearing, perfectly tinted for festive fetes or standing out in a sea of black. The back features a gold zipper, and the shoulders are accented with black pleather, providing just enough panache to keep it from being plain. Finally, The Dress has the ultimate modern feature every girl adores: pockets!

I bought The Dress a few years ago, and keep it in my repertoire for fancier occasions or last-minute plans. It pairs well with tights or without; with booties or flats or wedges or heels; and with or without an outer layer. I even recently wore it to a holiday event and a girlfriend was wearing essentially the same thing — the ultimate style compliment, in my opinion.

What’s your go-to garment when you need to be fashionable in a flash? Post a comment and let me know!

Cheers to the LRD!

30 Before 30

Image Courtesy of BrightSoLight on EtsyIn honor of my upcoming 30th birthday, I’ve researched countless “things to do before 30” lists. And while there are plenty to choose from, I kept coming back to “Thirty Things Every Woman Should Have and Should Know by the Time She’s 30.”

The List was originally published in Glamour by columnist Pamela Redmond Satran in 1997. Over the next 30 weeks, I’ll be tackling each item on The List and reflecting about it here… publicly (gulp). I hope you enjoy and we can grow together. After all, turning older is a privilege denied to many. Let’s begin!

By 30, you should have…
1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come.

Wow, way to start us off with a doozy. I instantly cringed when I saw this was my FIRST item on The List to “obtain.” My relationship history is bumpy and painful, full of letdowns and lessons. But that’s exactly what this first essay, by Genevieve Field, is about: learning.

Field mentions the Buddhist teaching that “every relationship we have in our lives, whether it lasts five hours with a stranger on a plane or fifty years with our soulmate, is meant to teach us something.”

As painful as it can be to think about love lost, I’m also able to look back and see how much I’ve learned and how far I’ve come…

The man I can imagine going back to is my most recent ex — not because of the recency, but because I truly felt we were a great match with poor timing. Our relationship ended, obviously, and in a not-so-great way. Had he not let me go, though, I don’t think I’d have ever ended it. I was in love and believed he was worth working through our challenges, as resentful as I (didn’t realize I) was growing. We haven’t had any contact in a few months, but I wish him well and hope he’s working through his needs, just as I’ve been working through mine.

The man who reminds me how far I’ve come was not a boyfriend, per se, but a romantic relationship all the same. I’ve never been one to fake interest or depend on others, but I threw all that aside to “be” with him. I let myself be second fiddle to whatever else he had going on; I tried really hard to care about video games; I depended on him to be my social calendar and support system and lost myself in the process. Our few months together were the best — I thought — until I ended it after another dead-end conversation about our future, and 20/20 hindsight helped me see that I didn’t even like myself anymore.

There’s nothing wrong with me, or these two men, for these failed relationships. We’re each on our own journey, and there’s no telling where those roads will lead us. In the meantime, I can be grateful for the lessons I’ve gained from each of them (and that the tears have subsided since each breakup).

Looking back on your relationships, do you have someone you can imagine going back to, and someone who reminds you how far you’ve come? Let me know in the comments!