The SF Bay Area has been battered with rain the last few weeks, and while it’s needed to overcome years of drought, it’s also really cramping my style. Much like in Florida, residents here seem to know nothing of umbrella etiquette, driving precautions or general how to handle this moisture falling from the sky.
I thought back to a post from what feels like a lifetime ago, in October 2011. It’s my Playlist for a Rainy Day, and tbh, it hasn’t changed all that much. I still crave brooding tones, somber lyrics and disconnecting from the outside world.
How do you handle endless rainy days? (I’m looking at you, Seattle readers!)
It’s taking all of me to not get political up in here, so let’s just breeze on past the pleasantries and jump into other topics:
- Air Conditioning: We had record-breaking temps in SF last weekend, and while 100 degrees doesn’t sound all that bad, consider experiencing it without central air. My tower fan became my BFF, but it wasn’t enough for Saturday’s misery. Thankfully, a friend and I sought refuge in stores and bars to beat the heat. Woof.
- Irma Prep: I’m not talking about LuLaRoe, y’all. As yet another hurricane makes its way to the States, I’ve got my eye on Irma. Paths aren’t always predictable, but I’m staying in close contact with family and friends about their evacuation plans. In the meantime, all I can really do is sit and wait. And tell the same thing to my thoughtful friends and co-workers here who keep asking about it 😉
- NOT Fantasy Football: Are you as surprised as I am? After about eight years of juggling fantasy teams with pools. pick ‘ems and survivor leagues, I’m taking a break. Well, from the fantasy part at least. I’ve declined four invitations and couldn’t be more excited to just watch the games this year without a ton of invested interest. Bonus: I won’t have player paralysis because I have someone in one league but am up against them in another.
- Magz’s Big Birthday: What’s the most exciting thing tomorrow brings? My momma has a milestone birthday to celebrate! I won’t talk numbers, because I am a lady, but I have high hopes for the year ahead. The best is yet to come for my favorite mother, and I can’t wait to see what her next year brings. 143 always.
While most of SF is recovering from its annual shitshow, Outside Lands, I’m recovering from my own shot nerves, lack of sleep and downright refusal to sit still. Let’s focus for the next few minutes, at least, on these:
- Poncho: I’ve had my eye on this delightful daily weather report for months, and it’s finally extended service to San Francisco! The forecasts are fun and factual, with equal parts story and sass. See if Poncho is in your area!
- Saving Grace: I’ve been reading more for fun lately, and this latest from seasoned storyteller Jane Green was a fast and easy-to-digest book. It made a six-hour flight more bearable, and it made me think about what people’s “perfect lives” really entail.
- Taco Bell Portraits: Brittany Nicole Creech is officially the most popular girl in America this week. Her senior portraits didn’t have your typical feather boa, fake rose and wistful expression — she took them at TACO BELL. Can you say #killingit?
- John Oliver Revamps Sex Ed: Speaking of high school, remember how awkward it was to learn (or not) about the birds and the bees from your inexperienced (or not) friends? John Oliver takes down the lack of sex education in America, and the crowning jewel is this star-studded video. Enjoy!
I’m in San Fran for work this week, and man, what I went through to get here. There’s a separate time and post for that, but in the meantime, here are some loverly ramblings for your enjoyment.
Mexico Au Parc: This little Mexican place near our office offers “agua fresca” every day; my favorite so far is the strawbs (with an enormous chicken quesadilla). For less than $10, you can fill up on traditional Mexican favorites — just make sure you beat the lunch rush, and get there before 12:05!
AT&T Park: Even though they lost, I took in a Giants game Monday night and loved every minute of it. There’s a huge slide for fans to play on, and the stadium overlooks the bay. How perfect is that?
This Weather: My hair now knows the feeling of zero-humidity weather and it’s fantastical. My skin freaked out a little bit from the lack of moisture in the air, but we’re on speaking terms now and all is well. Bonus: I can walk from the car to the office without dying of heat stroke!
Russian Hill: My favorite borough so far, there are tons of little unique shops and eateries along this stretch of land. Among some other noteworthy stops, the flank-steak sandwich from Rex Cafe and the ice cream from Swensen’s are heavenly. I had the Thin Mint ice cream with chocolate sprinkles … delicious.
So, there you have it. Although it’s a bit foreign to wear jeans and long sleeves in August, San Francisco has stolen my heart and I don’t foresee any plans to return it anytime soon.
If you’ve spent 10 seconds in Florida, you’re already aware that nobody here should have a license. And if you haven’t had the distinct honor of visiting God’s waiting room, then shorely you’ve read my rant about it and are well-informed.
This problem only grows progressively worse throughout the summer as storm clouds roll in. They establish residency quicker than Elian ever could, and they make everyday travel a real pain in my ass. What’s a state full of geriatrics and idiots to do?
- Go slow. Too slow. Do less. You might as well be going backward. If you approach the 20 MPH mark, come to a halt immediately. Don’t you dare allow the stumbling homeless man’s speed intimidate you.
- Tailgate. I’m not talking grilling brats and drinking brewskies, I’m saying to follow so closely that you can read the back of my Spice Girls shirt. And judge me for it.
- Stall out. While this one can’t always be avoided, I highly suggest you think before driving your MINI Cooper through streets with 3 feet of standing water. Oh, you flooded the engine? I, for one, am shocked!
- Frantically change lanes every 5–10 seconds. The left lane is moving, so you move over. Dammit, now the right is zooming … guess you’ll have to switch back. Ack, the guy on the left is turning; hurry! Why bother staying in one lane? Amateurs.
- Swerve without looking. Similar to changing lanes like a tard, you’ll need to swerve around puddles — but only do so without checking for cars around you. Really, you didn’t see my tank of an SUV? That’s because you’re too busy with your head up your sphincter.
I’m not saying gun it to 88, Doc Brown. I’m just saying I’d like to reach my destination sometime before I hit retirement — and in one piece, no less. Based on this week’s forecast, that’s not likely to happen.